The pros and cons of breathing [open]

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

They called me Amoria. whatever wonders they found in the name i must have missed it. Rather a stocky Andalusian mare i was, coloured a deep pearly grey, almost silver in the winter. Five years saw me average height, roughly 15.2 hands.. I certainly wasn't anything special, may have been once. But my history put my name, and my personality at disgrace. i hadn't always been like this. i hadn't always been this silly in the head. ignorant and foolish maybe, but i don't think i really chose to go down the path i did. Maybe. Maybe i had just been overwhelmed by my emotions. I used to be the happy one, the one who always said it will be alright. but now, i'm the one who kills the good vibe. Some might almost call me nasty. Maybe i was, maybe just a little. But i tried not to be, i really did. but you can't..

Silly voices inside my head, all the time telling me what to do. I couldn't tell which thoughts were mine anymore, let alone make rational decisions. Gods, i had slipped. Somewhere along the line i'd lost my grip on luck. on life. on myself. I'd been slowly slipping, falling further and further into the ground. Absolute mess i was, my coat, tattered and worn. Great clumps of matted mess in my hair. And the scars, oh there were so many. some fresh, some old. Leaving dirty, ugly grey lines of bald skin where they'd healed over. Some still bore scabs, they stank of infection. Some would heal, given time and care. But others, so many others, would be left as a reminder of my foolishness. They would scar, some for longer than others. But nonetheless, they were damnably ugly.

Something had happened, things felt strange around me. Like the world had shuddered and coiled in the middle, as if it were a giant rug being waved straight. It had felt as if the air had been sucked from my lungs for the splittest second, and as if the world had suddenly become fragile enough that the softest footfall would shatter it and send us all hurtling into oblivion. And then things had restored themselves, the sense of incredible unease disapating as quickly as it had come. Harks flicking backand forth with unease i dared not move for fear that i would activate some hidden trap. I waited until i felt secure enough to breathe before releasing the gust of oxygen deprived air from my lungs. My eyes swivelled in their sockets, still unsure that the shudder had passed. Something was wrong.. or.. Different. I stepped out, heart in my throat, panic-ridden. Then bolted clumsily for the shelter of the trees on the near horizon, i stumbled wrecklessly, my legs shaking with adrenaline. It was almost too late when i slid back on my haunches, using every inch of strength to stop myself from plundering from the cliff-face that had opened up underneath me.

I glared with shock, the island was.. not an island anymore. Where there had been a clear view of the ocean from the high mountain peaks where the forests were dense there was now nothing but a vast expanse of land. It was as if.. The islands had all joined together. The Ridge that i stood on was like a border.. A barrier between my lands, and the lands of the fire horses. I searched my brain for the name of the land.. But everytime i came close to catching it, it slipped from the corner of my awareness. instead another name came to my mind every time. Hentra.. This was hentra. Somehow the seperate lands had joined to one, blistering, ashen, barren grounds right in front of me. i Had a feeling that if i had wandered for days in the opposite direction, i would come across the earth lands. Earth, fire, water and air. it had always been like that. Why force the seperate alliances onto each other?

My eyes were clouded with thick confusion. A war was brewing, i could feel it in the prickling of my skin. Disaster was waiting around the next corner, this was not right. It wasn't supposed to be like this. It was impossible. Never should this have happened. Never say never.. The words escaped my lips before they even came to my mind. I shrugged a shoulder at the thought of them. What had just happened here? And then the words came to my mind. Ehcriale, Hentra, Adurna, Ularnne. This was it, the rebirth of Datholon..

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_{ooc| 778 words. not bad considering i haven't Rped in about a year. I'm a bit rusty though. This is also my Bio for Amoria. But whatevs =). REPLY}

[Cole]

I was bored, lingering endlessly in my home awaiting a response from someone who was apparently not there. With a shrug of my shoulders I trotted toward what I was sure was a dead end into the sea around me. Boy was I wrong, when I reached the edge of my home island I found another. There was so much water around here that I assumed I'd aimlessly wandered onto Adurna. Huh, how interesting. My red roan ears flickered here and there as my pale chestnut eyes looked for any signs of life.

My eyes searched and searched and then i saw movement. It spooked me and I shied a little but then with a laugh at myself I approached the grey mare. Being careful to stay away from the range of flailing hooves I spoke, my gentle, calm voice slipping from my mouth as I spoke to her. "Hello. My name's Cole. What's your's?" Then I let my voice go silent as I awaited a response from the mare before me. A slight stench of dwath assulted my nose and I figured that what she was looking at was Hentra. She seemed spooked by the idea of that place so close to this one.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

My thoughts wandered aimlessly through what my clouded, dusty eyes had just witnessed. Unable to make apparent sense of what was happening. My left ear flicked in anoyance, frustrated at my unruly stupidity. I glared coldly at my hooves, the once rounded granite like shapes now crooked, sharp edged stones. They were far from acceptable, although the discomfort didn't seem to matter these days. A while back i'd decided that pain wasn't something to be afraid of, it was something i could welcome with open arms. Considering that pain was only thing that made me feel alive, and not drowning in my own sick fantasies. Yes, i was pretty screwed up. But i couldn't even remember how it had got this bad. I mean what i'd been through, it wasn't anything bad enough to make me end up like this. was it? No, i shook my head, conversing with myself in my mangled mind. Stupid. You're being stupid. So i blew through my lips, shaking off my annoyance. And swung around in an effort to make the barren fire lands behind me invisible to my eyes. But as i turned the hairs on the back of my neck prickled, itching my skin and the blood rushed cold and quick through my veins. i shivered with the unease that i was being watched. Eyes darting restlessly about. I certainly couldn't see anybody, although i wasn't taking much care to be particularly observant.

I shrugged, taking a slow, hesitant step forward only to stumble clumsily when the jagged edges of my hoof tangled in the thin, whispy blades of grass below them. I scowled to myself, stupid. And as i looked up to be sure no one had seen my clumsiness i saw her. My cheeks flushed red hot. Embarassment? Don't be a fool. Quickly pulling myself together i raised my head, arching the once delicate neck. Trying to obtain that feeling of authority over this trespasser who had snuck up on me. I glared coldly at her. My cool, harsh eyes draping over her slowly. taking in her form. She looked fairly young, about one summer younger than myself, her coat a soft red roan, auburn mane flowing steadily down her neck. she was a pretty one. I was feeling suddenly self concious standing before her. Once upon a time she would have been no match for how stunning i was. But after.. recent events, that was not the case. My eyes narrowed, searching further than just her appearance, i couldn't sense any magic in her. Not like i could feel it in the other horses. This made me feel rather content. i sneered without compassion. Now i felt like i had the upper hand. I raised my head that little bit higher, topping her height by a short distance. I spoke to her then, after letting her wait. My voice a low growl in my throat, harsh and nasty. Amoria. My name is Amoria.

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[Cole]

I lifted my head a little bit as I watched the mare stumble a little. And then she spoke to me, she didn't sound pleased that I had intruded on her here. "Sorry for the intrusion Amoria. But I couldn't just stand in my home talking to non-existant equines." I told her. She was slightly taller than I was, possibly a year older, definately more scarred than I was. But once she may have been far prettier than I could ever hope to be. Her delicate grey coat totally conflicted her attitude.

My eyes appraised her, she was...slightly...intimidating to me. But I attributed it to the fact that she was bigger than I was. But that wasn't the reason my mind kept telling me, she had powers, I didn't, I was normal, she was elemental. I shushed my mind and looked back toward Amoria. Now was the time that I wished I had been born with some kind of power. And if I had any it wasn't making itself known to me or anybody else. Every now and again I found myself attempting to do something with the earth or water or anything around me. This was one of those times as I watched Amoria.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

I found myself thinking about how i reacted to other equines these days. It wasn't really something to be greatly proud of. Definately not. I was actually kind of.. Nasty. It made me sway back on my haunches slightly, as if i was suffering from a sudden dizzy spell, like those you experience just before you go into shock, or when you hold your breath for too long. But i wasn't shocked, and my breathing was quite normal. I was just.. Confused. At how i'd ended up this way, and at how i had no trouble at all making my authority clear. I liked being the boss, that was one thing that had never changed. But maybe my power over other equines was what had made me so arrogant, so selfish and cruel. No, it was the torture from Aurelia, my previous home. And that damned bastard Krieger. Or maybe it was both. pull yourself together. I glanced up and saw that the mare was watching me intently, multiple traces of expectancy in her expression. Recovering from my brief moment of weakness i flattened my ears menacingly, the ground shuddered underneath my hooves and the air was swelling with a thick humidity that was almost chokingly unbearable. Calm down, relax. My mane clung irritably to my neck from the sudden moisture in the air and the ground sloshed wetly beneath my hooves as i shifted my weight forward again. But just as quickly as the water responded to my distress, building up to blast this little arab filly before me it subsided. I smirked, the corners of my lips turning up as i glanced away from my company. i was learning to control this new power of mine. Once not so many moons ago i would have drowned everyhting within a hundred yards and not think anything of it.

As her words sunk into my head there were many responces that came rushing to my head. Some ruder than others. But i found myself keeping her waiting just as before, thinking carefully about what i should say. Show her what happens to those who wander into your path without perparing themselves. That was tempting, very tempting. You're alone. Think about that. And i did, i'd worked so hard to push everyone away from me. So much so that i'd succeded. and now it wasn't even something i had to think about. It just came naturally. i Worked to soothe the monster out of my eyes, willing the thick, dusky clouds to leave them until they were oddly clear and.. normal. And so i smiled, the gesture still unmistakably marked with madness. insanity. I assume you've taken advantage of the close proximity of our the lands. You had best be careful where you wander sister. You never know who you might come across.

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[Cole]

Sister? That was different. When the ground began to rumble and the air retrieved a new moisture. I looked toward the odd mare before me. So she was a waterbender. I'd never met one of them before. Or any of the other benders around these lands. But that was really no big surprise. I was brand new to these lands, and I liked to explore. As the mare spoke to me I smiled a little.

"Taking advantage of the close proximity, I wouldn't exactly call it that. I was just exploring, and stumbled upon this area. As to never knowing who I'm going to come across...I live for the danger of that." I told her with a toss of my head. "Though, I must admit, I've never run into another such as you Amoria." I told her with a smile still lingering upon my mouth. It couldn't hurt to attempt to make friends.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

My random outburst of power a moment before seemed to have intrigued the young mare before me. i saw curiosity in her eyes. Awe maybe? impossible. The gods had missed this one, somehow bypassing her and not gifting her with the power of any of the four elements. i was sure there were more than four elements out there, but none of those had seemed to let themselves be known. not yet atleast.. It made me wander what had made the gods decide to bestow such powers on some of us. How they had decided what gift would go to who. How did they judge us worthy? Was it physical strength? Or mental power. Self control maybe? Hm, i lacked most of those at the moment, so that couldn't be it. I was weak from starvation, ribs poking out from under the muddied coat slightly. i was completely, and utterly insane, so that crossed out mental strength, and i was only just learning the art of self control. Or, re-learning if you will. I never did quite understand the way a gods' mind worked. I often thought of myself as the ruler of Adurna, maybe because anyone else who tried to settle here ended up running as far away as they could get. In fear of being infected with my madness. But i was completely ordinary. Nothing special. Nothing at all.

I didn't really know what to think of this mare. What was her name again? Cole.. yes. That was it. Not a very common name really.. But it was her reactions that intrieged me. She was.. Different somehow. Strange. And i couldn't quite seem to figure out what she was thinking, most equine's moods were made apparant by their body language, and by their eyes. But hers didn't change, not even as i glared curiously at her for several minutes, her words turning over in my mind. I waited for her to grow impatient, but she never did. She just waited, like a well-disciplined child would. Interesting.. I continued to play her words over in my mind, tying to figure out what she was thinking.. Exploring.. Live for the danger.. Never run into another such as you Amoria.. I felt i slight pang of annoyance as she spoke my name and my ears flicked back and forth undecidedly. She had nerve. I could almost sense a slight hint of sarcasm, was she challenging me maybe? you're being paranoid. Yes, yes i was. I kept my head high, unsure whether or not it was safe to let her feel welcome yet. i was new to this, to being kind. It didn't feel right. But change was in the air. and as much as i hated change i felt it necessary to have atleast ONE ally. So i smiled, flashing my brilliant white teeth. And even as i spoke the words in response to the very last sentence she had left me i could hear the unmistakable insanity ringing in my voice. I'm quite sure you haven't.

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[Cole]

What an odd mare was this Amoria. She didn't seem to be able to read me. This was a plus. "You're the first Elemental I have run into, and the first, slightly mean mare." I told her. No, I wasn't attempting to challenge her, I just wanted to make a few friends here or there. She would be the first to actually be a friend to me. I smiled a little toward her. "So, do you pretty much own this place Amoria?" I asked her and waited for a reply.

I needed to get a few allies, I never knew when I might need them. So with another toss of my head throwing my auburn mane a little into the air. I'd like having Amoria as an ally. She was strong and well, slightly stubborn. She was almost exactly like me. Who would be the one to throw the question out into the air between us? Her...or me? Guess we'll have to wait and see.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

Now i was really getting annoyed. Or was it really annoyance? Frustration maybe? I was undecided. I just couldn't figure it out. She was here for something, that much i was sure of. Although it may not have been the case to begin with, i could feel it now. A roll of thunder sounded above and as i averted my eyes to the sky for a moment i allowed myself time to scowl silently. You're doing it again. I took a moment to pull myself together, disguising my moment of lost self control in a deep, cold glare. Slightly mean mare ey?. I chose not to answer that. Not straight away. I was still caught between herding the little mare back to where she belonged. But i couldn't help but notice certain similarities between us. They tore at my mind, pushing my instincts further back into my awareness and making room for rational thinking. It had been months, maybe even up to a full year since i had been able to think this clearly without the madness making my deicisions for me. But nevertheless i still found myself feeling dazed and confused. I took a step forward, testing the others bravery.

I had all the time in the world to think of my answer. But lacking the crazy anger that had posessed me for the past twelve months i felt oddly empty. My senses were dulled. I found myself instantly filled with unquenchable desire to bring the madness back to it's full power. It was like my head was hollow, without the alter-ego whispering inside my head. So my eyes narrowed at her. She must think i was incredibly ill, my split personality making my mood shift continuously. I felt the sudden need to make my authority known. To state my leadership. That's better.. There it was again, back the way it should be. Or shouldn't be. My eyes were thickly clouded again. Sparkling with cruelty. That would be correct.

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[Cole]

With a rise of my head I smirked a little. "I could tell. You had that leader's aura around you." I told her as I lowered my gaze and head again. Well, it looked like she wasn't going to be the one to put it in the open. Guess it was up to me. I briefly closed my eyes as I thought how to phrase it. Eventually I decided to state it bluntly.

"Amoria, I may not be a leader, but I wish to make an alliance with you. And to have your friendship." I told her and fell silent once again. Truth be told, I really could use a friend like her. I hoped she would ally with me, even though I was powerless and landless. Eventually a stallion would claim the Island...or well, spit of land that was my home, and then I would have a true home and leader.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

I let out a chuckle. More a breath of tuned air than anything. Barely audible, just a low rumble in the back of my throat, but nonetheless, it was still a laugh. i felt incredibly smug at her words, they had a certain ring to them that made me feel like all hope was not lost. That i was still one of the stronger ones. One of the.. more fortunate. It made me hold my head that little bit prouder, menacingly almost. But i had to be careful not to let my head swell too much. For this could all be an act. If i didn't have my wits about me, the i could pay for being foolish. Watch yourself. You can't trust her yet. So i flicked my tail and held her gaze. My eyes not narrowed this time. There was no need for a response to what she had said. The laugh was enough. And so i waited, with not so much fine tuned patience as Cole had presented earlier, but still. it was enough. She seemed to be troubled, and for a moment my ears pinned to my neck, cautious of what was brewing. But then i remembered that she posessed no power like my own, and my ears flicked forward again, a gush of air somewhat like relief pressing through my lips. I was wary of her, careful of what i said. I had never been a horse of many words. I wore my heart on my sleeve, and showed how i was feeling through physical movements rather than speech. So i was easily keeping my dialogue to a minimum.

There were many things i considered as possibilities for what she might say. But friendship certainly wasn't one of the things i saw her requesting. I swayed back on my haunches again, eyes wide and curious. Shocked at her request. I considered her for a moment, my expression thoughtful, eyes wondering. Don't be a fool. The girl has no power. I flicked my ears in annoyance at the blunt voice in my head, pushing it to the back of my awareness. No, i could see possibilities in allying with this mare. Although she lacked any elemential powers, or any marks of authority or leadership. There was something about her. She was.. Dominant, stubborn. She could be the better half of my reasoning. It would, after all, be a plus to have an extra pair of ears, and eyes for that matter. Yes, this could work in my favour. And besides, i think i might actually like the girl, she was.. real. Not fake and pretending like most other equines i'd known in my time. Yes, this could be great. I might even find myself with a friend. And that was something i'd been without for far too long. Idiot. I smiled menacingly, but lowered my head in a gesture of acceptance. Levelling my gaze with hers. Treating her almost as an equal. But my eyes were still firm, warning her that betrayal had a high price. Well then, i accept.

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[Cole]

Ah yes, we had an agreement. With a dip of my own head to her, I spoke, the look on her face told me not to betray. Never had I betrayed anyone. "Then we have an agreement. If ever I should need you or you me, we know where to find one another." I told her with a smile as I raised my head again with my own little way of saying to her as well that she should not think to betray me either.

OOC- Ick, short post sorry.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

Enough idle chit chat for today. I simply inclined my head to the little mare before me. Very rarely did anyone get a gesture of respect higher than that. I wasn't one to put my faith in others. But i supposed it couldn't hurt to atleast put half a heart into this. If not a small piece. Very small at that. I was feeling suddenly exhausted, all this thought of friendship and happy things had used up the last of my reserves. i was spent. although i hadn't really done anything physical, the sudden sting of many nights without sleep hit me. I found my thoughts wandering to why it was that i hadn't been sleeping. To why i'd been wandering aimlessly through the dark. Stumbling with clumsiness on things i couldn't even hope to see in the pitch black. Mostly it seemed to be my own feet i was tripping over. Get this over with. She's wasted enough of your time already. My eyes flicked warily to the mare again. they stung numbly as the sun shone off her exhuberant body.

Nightmares. That's what i would put it down to. My lack of sleep was caused by fear. Fear of the things that would be there waiting for me when i finally managed to close my eyelids. Maybe that's why i was thinking so clearly today. Because the cloud of confusion and anger had been subdued by my theoretically 'peaceful' nights over the past week or so. Peaceful.. I didn't realise how warped the words sounded until that inevitable, cutting voice repeated them mockingly in my head. How could i be feeling peaceful when i hadn't slept in half a dozen nights? This wasn't peace, this was cowardice. The very thing that had led me to end up like this. i sighed, obviously i wasn't getting any better at this game. My blood flowed cold and slow through my veins, making me feel that much more dead. I wondered if i'd ever feel real again. If things would ever be right. Or if i'd ever have the chance to start over again. Not likely sweetheart. I sneered at the sarcastic use of the pet name. Is that what i was? A pet. A pet to myself, a slave to my own sub-conciousness. Pathetic. Pathetic..

ooc | ick. short, yuck, no muse. i'm feeling a little lost today. eclipse has made me realise how non-eventful my life is these days.

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[Cole]

My pale chestnut eyes watched the grey mare before me. She looked so exhausted, I couldn't help but wonder whether she been missing her sleep or if she always looked that way. I lifted my gaze to the sky as a few scattered clouds fluttered into prescence over the sun. I felt the change in the air, something major was coming, and frankly I was pleased that I had a friend among the elementals, and ally. Something was going to happen, and whatever it was, it made the hairs along my neck and spine to stand up.

Dropping my gaze once more to the grey mare, I looked her over. She was exhausted, and I put it down to the fact that she'd never slept in a long time, her eyes showed this. "Do you feel the change Amoria?" I asked her as a swift breeze fluttered past me and raked it's freezing fingers over my coat. No breeze from the sea had ever been that cold to the touch, I shuddered just a little as I looked around expecting something to spring up and attack. I was on edge, my eyes raked the horizons. Could it be that the elemental spirits were coming back? Could a war be readying itself just over the horizon? I hoped not, for I was not ready if such were the truth. Suddenly my head shot up. I heard the approach of someone...or something And my eyes raked for it again.

OOC-Aww...sometimes books can do that to ya.

[¤ a m o ŗįâ ;;]

Bit of a, weird, kind of power to give someone isn't it? Power over an element. And there were moments, more than i could remember, when i wished that i'd been given something other than water to play with. i mean, it was really just. water. Wasn't it? I found myself wondering what other power i would have chosen if i'd been given the choice, and my mind strayed to the days a few weeks back that i'd spent with a stallion named Vow. God of the fire horses. But that was back when the element territories had been islands. Now that they had all merged together it was a little.. diffferent i guess. I crinkled my nose at the memory of the purtid stench of the fire lands, a smell i wouldn't soon be forgetting. And thought of how the scenery had almost matched my bitter mood during the time i had spent there. The vague memory of why i had gone there floated heavily at the back of my mind. But i tried not the think about it. What i had been planning to do was utterly unacceptable. Insane. I don't even remember how i'd come to end up back here on adurna, last thing i knew i'd still been following Vow about, cussing at him under my breath and spitting insults at him every chance i got. He had been alot like me then. Crazy, mad, nasty. Shrouded in a mist of darkness that showed no signs of easing any time soon. That cloud still hung low over my head, but maybe, not as dense as before.

I was finding it hard to concentrate on the situation at hand, every time i tried to channel my attention to the little amber coloured mare it found another flaw in my concentration and slipped into more thoughts that didn't need to be registered just yet. They could wait, couldn't they? It slowly came to my attention that the little mare was gazing anxiously at the sky. And so i let my eyes shift curiosly to where she was looking, noting the thick, purple-grey clouds gathered above us. The air suddenly stank of a storm, and i noticed that the shallow forest was silent. Silent the way was it only was when all other wildlife had fled for the safety of shelter. Hm, interesting. I shivered as a cool wind blew over my shoulders and the first few crystal clear drops of rain splattered on my coat, turning it a slightly darker shade. I searched for Cole's eyes, a smug smile making it's way to my face. I blinked twice and then instead of soaking into my coat the rain started to bounce away a few inches from my skin, keeping me bone-dry in the cool, icy wind. The rain was light, merely spitting. But i had no doubt that it would soon worsen. Ah, yes. The pro's and cons of breathing, it was times like these i thanked the gods for gifting me power over the water. Although fire would probably be an aweful lot of fun during the times when i was feeling slightly more.. destructive.

I cocked an eyebrow at the sudden wariness of my new aquaintance. She seemed on edge, the way one would act as they sensed someone watching them. I shrugged the thought off as paranoya, there was no one here. i was sure of it. thought maybe my own certainty couldn't be trusted anymore. i wasn't very good at determining real from imaginary these days. But to me, the land was all but deserted, apart from the rare passer-by every couple of days. I had only myself to thank for that, and my hostile, alter-ego. Holding my head suddenly higher i pranced forward a few steps, a lithe edge to my gait hinting at my once agile movements, but it was near impossible to hide the slight awkwardness i carried now due to the torn muscles and infectious scrapes and gashes covering my flanks. I almost longed for the flawless grace i used to be able to carry myself with. But being this tired, and this battered hadn't done me any good. I jogged past Cole, sparing her a sympathetic glance, she wouldn't want to be caught out in the storm, probably unable to navigate her way back to her homeland. Don't underestimate her, she could be more capable than you give her credit for. Nevertheless i turned my head slightly, careful to avoid eye contact, just a few strides away from her on my search for shelter. Unsure of what reaction to expect from her i filled my voice with authority, the way a stallion would. You coming sister?

ooc | 810 words. not bad =). Sorry if it's a bit confusing, i'm a bit distracted tonight..

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